Bully Me This (Bully Me #1): A Best Friend's Brother Bully Romance Page 4

  Nothing without her?

  Damn, is this chick shitting me? Tiffanie Melrose hasn’t the faintest idea who I am or what I’m capable of. I’ve only ever allowed her to see what I’ve wanted her to see. I’m a man of many faces and this dumb bitch doesn’t even know the half of it. Trust me, she doesn’t want to know because if she did then she’d run a fucking mile.

  Fortunately for her, she’s lucky enough to be in a position where she’ll never find out, but fuck if I haven’t come close. She’s infuriating as hell and she grates on my last nerve. I need the mother of all rewards for dealing with her bullshit every damn day. Not that I’ve been given any other choice.

  Daddy-fucking-dearest made damn sure of that little situation.

  My jaw ticks at the memory and the less I think about it the better. Instead, I focus on clearing my mind. I breathe in deep through my nose, relax my shoulders and count to three.

  One elephant… two elephant.. three elephant… stay calm Colby. Tiffanie really isn’t worth the ball ache.

  When I feel calm enough to open my eyes, I find Tiffanie on her knees before me, a look of hunger on her overly enhanced face.

  “You’re stressed, baby. Let me help you unwind.”

  Unwind? I’m coiled tighter than a fucking boa constrictor and I feel like I could blow at any second. I know that won’t be my greatest move, so I need to stay calm and keep my fucking mouth shut.

  I decide it’s better not to answer her. Instead, I take another pull on my joint before throwing my head back and allow Tiffanie to do her thing.

  I guess she has some uses.

  CHAPTER SIX

  WILLOW

  “How was work?”

  Hadley appears in the doorway as soon as I enter the living area. My feet are aching, and my head feels like it’s throwing its own private rave.

  “Do you want the long story or short?” I kick off my shoes and slide down on the sofa and my muscles ache from head to toe.

  The lack of sleep is really starting to have an effect on me, but I’m not about to bitch about it. Bitching leads to questions, and questions lead to answers I don’t want to confess out loud.

  “Oh, now that all depends on how juicy the details are.” Hadley falls down next to me on the sofa and I throw my tired legs over hers. “Spill.” Hadley claps her hands with glee and her brown eyes sparkle with excitement.

  “Nothing excites you more than drama, and sometimes that kind of scares me.” I confess. Hadley’s always been the same. She’s always loved being in the know—at all times. If shit was going down, then you could guarantee she’d be there watching from the sidelines with a flag in one hand and popcorn in the other.

  “Because drama makes the world go around. It runs in my veins. It’s the air that I breathe, and it feeds my needy soul.”

  “Maybe we should think about changing jobs? There’s always plenty of drama at Sinner’s.”

  “What, and breathe the same polluted air as Ryder? No thanks. I think I’ll pass. I’d much rather claw my eyes out.” Her eyes narrow and I could kick myself for being so stupid. What the hell am I thinking? Ryder and Hadley haven’t been in the same room for years, and for good reason too. The last time she almost got arrested, and she only escaped a conviction because Ryder was adamant that he wasn’t prepared to press charges.

  “I’m so sorry, Hads.” One of these days I might just learn to think before my mouth starts vomiting verbal diarrhea. And I am sorry. More than she will ever know because Hadley, still right up to this very day blames Ryder for Colby’s sudden and unexpected departure. I know Ryder isn’t to blame and he knows it too, but he plays along for Colby’s sake, and to protect me.

  I’m the real reason Colby skipped town, even if I don’t know why. All I know is that he stole my heart and shattered it into a million pieces purely for his own sick and twisted pleasure. But there’s no way I can tell Hadley about any of it. If I do then a whole next level shit storm will open up, unleashing its rage around us and this one won’t stop. These hidden truths will rage around us, tearing everything apart, leaving no one untarnished—this will destroy us all.

  “It’s not your fault he’s such a jerk, Will.”

  “Have you tried to speak to him?”

  “Are you fucking crazy?” Hadley looks at me like I’ve just grown two heads. “If I see him, I’ll make sure I kill him this time around. Ryder knows better than to come anywhere near me.”

  Ryder. Of course she’s talking about Ryder. I guess Colby isn’t always on everyone’s mind like he is with me. “I don’t mean Ryder.” I tell her flatly and I wish I’d kept my big mouth shut. I should have headed straight to bed like I’d planned. “I mean Colby.” I almost choke on his name. It’s been a hell of a long time since I last said it out loud, but thankfully Hadley seems far too busy with her own thoughts to notice my secret hell.

  When she finally brings herself to look at me, I see her brown eyes are full of unshed tears. Fuck. What have I done? The last thing I wanted to do was upset her. Me moving back here was supposed to be the start of something new—something fun. Just like old times, but I guess that’s hard to do when too much has happened along the way.

  As much as I hate to admit it, I’m not the same person I was back then. A part of me wishes I was, yet a bigger, stronger part of me is glad I’m not.

  “Of course I have. But Colby doesn’t return my calls. You know what he’s like.” She sighs. “He’s a stubborn son of a bitch. When he doesn’t want to speak to someone, he’ll cut them out like they meant nothing to him. It hurts, you know. It hurts like nothing else. I’m his baby sister. We should have been there for each other when things got bad. He should have been here for mom and dad, but how could he when Ryder drove him out?”

  I feel terrible as I watch my best friend break down before me and it’s all my fault. Her breathing is labored and her fragile body judders as she tries her damned hardest to control her emotions. It’s so hard to watch, especially knowing this is all my fault, but I don’t know why and I sure as hell don’t know how to fix it. For whatever reason, totally unbeknown to me this is all my doing and I can’t make it right. And then just when I thought she couldn’t break me anymore, she says, “It’s like when he left, he took a huge part of me with him, but for what? He’s erased everything and anything that ever mattered to him—like we didn’t exist.”

  The truth is, I do know. I know exactly how she feels. Only I didn’t mean anything to Colby, I never did. I was just someone he could play with for his own sick and twisted games—to pass the time, but when he left, he took a huge part of me too.

  He took my trust.

  He took my heart.

  He also took my soul too, albeit unwillingly.

  But after all this time, I never knew about Hadley and Colby. I’d always assumed he would have done everything within his power to keep in touch with her.

  They were so close when we were growing up, even as we got older too. Obviously, he decided to cut all ties with Hadley too. I shouldn’t be too surprised, after all, if there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s that Colby Carter is the master of destruction.

  “Hey, he could still call.” I offer, but my voice is weak and lacks any trace of conviction. “I’m sure he has his reasons. You know he would never cut you off unless he felt like he didn’t have any other choice.”

  I don’t know why I’m defending him and telling Hadley this. It doesn’t make me feel any better. If anything, it makes me feel worse because here I am, lying to her once again. It’s becoming a bad habit, one that I need to get rid of and fast.

  I know Colby would have had his reasons, no matter how fucked-up they are, because I was one of them—probably the main contributing factor, but there’s no way I can tell Hadley that. No matter how much I want to and ease the burden of my guilt. I just can’t do it.

  Hadley hates Ryder as it is, and that poor guy. Yes, he has his faults and made my life hell when we were kids, but he’s the innocen
t party in all of this, so I dread to think what she’d do to me.

  Hadley gently dabs her tears away before they can fall and she turns to look at me, pushing a stray blonde curl behind her ear as she says, “Willow, it’s been five years. If he was gonna call then he would have done it already.”

  I decided against telling Hadley what happened at Sinner’s. Why add to her upset? I didn’t think she’d appreciate me discussing Ryder when she still harbors so much hate for him. That would be selfish of me, but not as selfish as I’ve been over the years.

  I don’t even know what really happened between me and Colby. We were best friends. All three of us, and then one day he just turned on me, and over time his games would grow nastier. I soon realized the more I let him affect me, the worse he became. He was evil and he didn’t care about anyone’s feelings but his own. In time he grew to hate me—absolutely despised everything about my being for something I had zero control over. It didn’t matter what I tried to do or say, he made it perfectly clear that our friendship was over.

  I tried so hard to understand him. To figure out his sudden change in mood, but if anything, that only made him hate me more.

  Jeez, I really thought I’d moved passed all this, but being back in this house, awakening old feelings, being back in his room—it’s done all things kinds of crazy to my head.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  WILLOW

  “Mom and Dad are going out tonight. Some fancy event at work or something…”

  A mega watt smile takes over my face. This can only mean one thing. I love staying at Hadley’s place because it totally beats staying at home. I stay at hers most nights, but when her mom and dad go out, they always leave money behind so we can grab takeout. Taki’s is always the takeout of choice. It feeds my soul and makes me feel safe.

  “Is Colby going to be home?” I ask, my voice is weak, and my stomach drops while I wait for her reply. Colby and Hadley were inseparable and all three of us have always been super close. Their mom and dad call us the three musketeers, but recently Colby hasn’t been his usual friendly, carefree self. At least not towards me, anyway.

  He started to act differently toward me, like I suddenly didn’t deserve his time or the air he breathed which only heightened when his friends came around—Ryder especially.

  Ryder doesn’t like me much and I have no idea why. As far as I know I haven’t done anything to upset him. But he took an instant dislike to me as soon as we met, and he’s never been afraid to make his feelings towards me known.

  I thought Colby might have stood up for me. After all, he’s known me longer, but if anything, having Ryder around only feeds his darkness. When the two of them are together Colby always plays up to Ryder and he always takes his side. He loves to play along with his games—and it hurts.

  It hurts a hell of a lot more than it did when I found out my dad had abandoned me. It hurts a hell of a lot more than my mom’s ignorance of my existence too. I always thought Colby was part of the family which I chose, but he clearly doesn’t feel that way anymore.

  Instead, I try to focus on me and Hadley. I try my best to block out Colby and Ryder when they’re around, and no matter how much they taunt me or hurt me, I’ll never tell Hadley because I don’t want either of them knowing just how much their hurtful words and actions affect me. I won’t give them that power. I’ll never allow either of them to claim a hold over me.

  “I don’t think so. I overheard mom telling dad he’s staying over at Ryder’s tonight. Why, is Ryder hassling you again?”

  “No,” I lie. The truth is Ryder is always hassling me, but I guess it’s something I’m just going to have to learn to deal with. “I just thought we could have a girly night. No boys allowed and all that.”

  I laugh nervously as relief floods through me now I know Ryder and Colby won’t be jumping out of any hidden corners. They get a real kick out of tearing me down and recently while Ryder’s been around at Hadley’s place, I’ve found myself wanting to be at home, all alone waiting for my mom to surprise me with a rare appearance.

  “Oh, look who it isn’t.”

  My back stiffens at the sound of his voice and an icy chill trickles down my spine. I knew it would be too good to be true.

  Hadley must sense my fear as she whispers, “Ignore him. They’ll be gone soon.” She places her hand in mine and pulls, trying to edge me toward the door, but I can’t move.

  “I thought you said he wasn’t coming over?” I bite back, panic is laced in my voice and I know Hadley picks up on it right away.

  “I didn’t think they’d be here. Mom said they we’re out. Come on, we’ll go inside and leave them to terrorize someone else.”

  “Hey, Willow.” Ryder calls over to me. “Why are you running?” He snarls when he looks at me and the momentarily hold he had on me vanishes as I quickly spin on my heels to look at him. Colby is stood by his side, complete with an evil smirk etched onto his beautiful face, and his cold, gray eyes look deadly.

  “I’m not running. I’m leaving—learn the difference.”

  “Hey, Colby. Look like someone finally got their period.” Ryder nudges Colby in the side and they both laugh. “She’s feeling brave. You’re a feisty one, Willow. I like that a lot.”

  “Well, we don’t like you so how about you turn around and go annoy someone else?” Hadley shouts back and this time when she pulls on my hand I almost fall flat on my face. Fortunately, I manage to find my balance and compose myself just in time. The last thing I need is to give them something else to laugh about.

  “Wait. Don’t go.” Colby calls after us and there’s a tiny hint of something in his voice. Sadness? Regret? “Why don’t you come hang out with us?”

  “Because you’re friend’s a douche.” Hadley retorts and her face is fierce. I don’t think I’ve ever loved her more than I have right in this very moment.

  “I hate him.” I tell her as we cross the threshold into her house—my safe place and I know she thinks I mean Ryder. Sure, I hate Ryder too, but not as much as Colby. Ryder and I didn’t have a friendship before, we had nothing to lose, but Colby? We had everything to lose.

  I don’t know what Ryder’s problem is, but he always seems to bring out the worst in Colby, and I don’t have a good feeling about it at all.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  COLBY

  Darkness encases me as I turn into the narrow alley.

  The bitter wind tears through my jacket, but adrenaline pulsates through my veins preventing me from feeling the full impact. A protection I wear well.

  I shouldn’t be here.

  This was never part of my grand plan, but life happens and if I’ve learned anything along the way, it’s easier to just roll with it. You need to look out for number one in this life because the ones who claim to care for you, where are they when you need them? Fucking nowhere. When you need them the most, they’re nowhere to be fucking seen.

  I’m living proof of that.

  I had everything. I have everything I ever wanted or needed and so much more. I had a family who loved me. I was the fucking golden boy to them and my friends. I had a mom, a dad, and a little sister who I loved more than anything. Nothing could ever tear me away from them—or so I foolishly thought.

  At the click of a finger everything can turn around on you and leave you with nothing. But the only solace I can find in this crazy fucked-up situation is that I did this for them. To keep them safe: mom, dad and Hadley.

  But just look at me now. Not a motherfucking person in sight.

  Get it together, Colby. That’s all in the past. You made your choice and now you have to live with the consequences.

  When I reach the bottom of the alley, I pause and run a weary hand down my face. “Game on.” I tell myself while plastering on my best poker-face before pushing open the door. The same as I do every time I’m here—like fucking clockwork.

  Only this time it feels different. The silence is deadly, clinging to my body, reminding me of what lays ah
ead in my not too distant future.

  “Deano.” I call out into the darkness and my voice echoes out around me. “Deano, are you in here?” I try again but once again I’m met with nothing but the echo of my own voice. What the fuck’s happening? Where is he? Deano told me to meet him here at eight, and that son of a bitch knows I’m always on time.

  The room is in total darkness—again, something else which is unheard of. I reach out and press the switch and the room fills with light. I focus my eyes, adjusting to the brightness and look around but there’s no sign of life. Everything is empty. The chairs are vacant when they’d usually be bursting at the seems this time of night. There’s always at least five or so guys knocking around, kicking back with a beer, or playing pool while waiting for a call, even when Deano isn’t around. There’s always someone here to oversee business.

  This place is dead. There’s no sign of life anywhere, and Deano can go fuck himself if he thinks I’m wasting my time sitting around waiting for the motherfucker to show up. I do enough for him already. Even if it is against my will, but I’ll draw the line at becoming anyone’s bitch.

  Just as I’m about to turn and get the hell out of here, I hear a noise. Nothing to shout home about, just a small groan coming from the far end of the room behind the pool table. Obviously one of the guys is taking advantage of Deano’s absence and enjoying some pussy. Man, it won’t be worth his legs if Deano catches him. This place has always been a whore free zone.

  A part of me feels like walking away. This isn’t my problem, but any decisions are taken out of my hands when I hear a familiar voice.

  “Can’t a guy get a couple minutes privacy?”

  “Deano?” I turn around and witness the sorry sight before me—Deano with his shorts down his ankles—a sight which will forever be burned into my mind.

  “What do you want, Colby?” he demands like I’m suddenly an inconvenience.